9 Things That Help Me Out in Working with the Homeless

by T.J. Piccolo

T.J. is serving on the Hope University team at Room In The Inn this year through the Young Adult Volunteer program of the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.).

Working with the homeless can be tough for me at times, especially when I first started. I just now feel like I'm over the "new guy" hump of the camel. Now some people know me, and when they have a problem, without looking at my name tag, they shout at me by name! Oh, what a wonderful feeling it is, indeed!

But truthfully, I am only half-kidding. Now some people will come to me when they are upset BECAUSE WE HAVE A RELATIONSHIP. THIS IS A BIG DEAL BOLD UNDERLINE ALL CAPS.

When you first start, no one knows your name and they all assume you know nothing or that you are a volunteer. In my case, they were right on both counts, and, as I am a slow learner, they continue to be right sometimes. But now they no longer tell me that they don't want to talk to me but that they do want to talk to a former employee who hasn't worked at Room In The Inn for several months. Now sometimes they want to talk to me! And I owe it to these 9 easy things.

T.J. (second from right) with friends at Room In The Inn

Thing #1: Name Recognition

[This is a fictional example. I do not know a participant named Zoolu, even though I wish I did.]

"What's up, Zoolu?! How's your morning?!?!" I ask (sometimes) enthusiastically and smiley, whilst extending a friendly fist.

"All right, T.J.," says low-key, cool Zoolu.

"All right!" Says me, very excited about the fist bump I am receiving.

"All right," says Zoolu. He does not stop as he gives the dorky volunteer-for-a-year that tries too hard the fist bump, and keeps on walking.

Sometimes that is all my relationship is with a participant. But it becomes routine in the best way possible. Even though many Zoolu's are laid back, I can still tell they are appreciative of the name recognition. It helps with a lot of things. We can stick up for each other. If a participant is giving me a hard time, Zoolu can tell them to chill and that I'm just trying to help. If Zoolu has a day where he is letting out frustration in a negative way, I can pull Zoolu aside and ask him what's up, because I know him and I've never seen him act like this before. He might calm down a little bit and tell me what's up because we know each other.

But the name recognition is crucial. Zoolu is not just another face in the crowd to me, nor am I to him. I give him his mail without asking for his name. I know him, thus he is known at Room In The Inn.

Stylish Room In The Inn staffer Jay

Thing #2: Compliments

Sometimes the general public is not so friendly. I'm not saying the general public is mean, but I'm not saying the general public is warm either. So a simple compliment can go a long way. Genuine ones go even further.

Some people in the homeless community take whatever clothes they can get, and do not always get the chance to choose what they wear. So often times, I give them a compliment on what they are wearing.

"Oh, I like your hat!"

"Looking sharp today!"

"I'm digging the scarf."

I've seen compliments like this perk people right up. It has probably become my best ice breaker with women participants.

"Thank ya, baby! It keeps my hair dry and matches everything!" Exclaim multiple women participants.

Obviously, I don't leave the compliments to physical appearance. I like to give props when people teach me about Nashville or tell me something new, or educate me, or tell me how they are trying to better themselves, or how far they have come, or what have you. I try to give compliments whenever I can about whatever I can.

The Laundry Room

Thing #3: Folding Laundry

When you work at Room In The Inn, folding laundry is encouraged, but I've been told before that you don't have to do it. Most employees do it anyway. It goes a long way, even when participants don't want their clothes folded (which is rare). There have been a few times when people receive their clean laundry and they are shocked about the folded laundry. I've seen people blush over it. No exaggeration.

"You folded it for me?"

Heck yeah, we did! We try to keep your shirts wrinkle-free for your benefit because we love you!

Room In The Inn receives mail for 1,000+ people.

Thing #4: Double-Checking Mail

There are many times a participant will ask me to double check for their mail even though I just looked through the pile and didn't see their name. I can be 100% sure that this person's mail has not yet arrived, but I will look through the pile again anyway.

A participant can be looking for something very important: a paycheck, a social security card, a birth certificate, an ID, a food stamp card, etc. These things are essential for finding housing, jobs, food, etc. If I can ease intensity and anxiety by looking for a person's mail again, then I will. It never hurts to check twice, and even if it still isn't there the second time, the participant knows these things:

• I looked for it again (even if there is a long line behind them)

• I care enough to look again

• I want them to receive their important mail

• I am on their side

To put it simply, they appreciate it, and they remember it.

Thing #5: Empower & Encourage

A former coworker at Room In The Inn gave me some of the excellent advice I will never forget:

"Do not do for others what they can do for themselves."

Obviously, this does not mean something like "Do not hold the door open for a man in a wheelchair just because he can do it himself." It means there are things participants can do themselves that they will ask staff to do for them. But if the participants do these things, they will feel empowered that they did it themselves.

"Please go get me some cough drops," Zoolu says to me as I was walk by. He is sitting in a chair where he is a few feet from the support desk. He can easily go to the support desk and ask the staff behind the desk for some cough drops himself.

"You got legs, Zoolu!" I joke back in a serious tone as I walk away, leaving him to get his own cough drops.

It is the small things.

"I'll help you with the application, but you have to fill it out yourself."

Sometimes it is encouragement.

"Hey! You're just sitting right now. Why don't you go take a class so you can get points for that laundry voucher you said you wanted earlier?"

"You don't have to wait until tomorrow. Job Search is still open for another half hour. You should go give it a try. They'll walk you through whatever pace you need."

"Okay, so they didn't hire you, but at least you did the best you could at the interview! It's not like you're just sitting around wasting time. You are actively looking for housing and a job. You're doing great. Keep going. Something is bound to turn up."

Being homeless can be a hard cycle to break. Encouragement and empowerment can remind participants that it is not impossible to break.

Jesse, who works in our education department, is an encouraging fellow.

Thing #6: An Inside Joke

Naturally, humor is an important element when working with the homeless. The environment can become heavy and/or gloomy otherwise. Take it a step further and build a small, lighthearted joke between you and an individual or small group of participants. That way you have an inside joke.

I have one inside joke where a participant is a king, so I play the "trumpet" for him whenever he approaches me. Another participant, who is Spanish speaking, often says something lighthearted to tease to me, at which I will shake my head at him because I have no idea what he is saying. Another participant jokes that I steal his things. One participant calls me "mailman."

So on and so forth. It always gives us something to laugh about.

Thing #7: Dancing

I have moves that just won't quit, and it always gives the participants something to cheer about.*

*or, more commonly, something to complain about.

The view from Room In The Inn

Thing #8: Listening

Stupid jokes. Sad tales. Complaints. Personal history. Important life lessons. God moments. Failed relationships. The past. The future. Goals. Hopes. Grief. Appreciation.

These are all things that are communicated by a participant in their body language or in conversation. Sometimes directly, sometimes paraphrased. Most times, all they want is to be heard.

Thing #9: Remembering

Remember what you listened to.

If you remember a participant saying they had a death in the family, ask them how they are doing or find a way to show them love.

If you remember that a participant needs gloves, tell them where there are gloves.

Remember participants that have passed and honor them.

The list goes on.

Complex and Connected: What causes chronic homelessness?

The causes of homelessness are complex and connected to one another. Listed are some of the reasons that people who come from a wide variety of backgrounds find themselves on the streets. The chronically homeless invariably suffer from a combination of these factors.


Mental Illness

Schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, and other severe and persistent mental illness;

Physical Disabilities

Profound injuries, illness, birth defects, or socially debilitating physical traits (such as disfigurement, dental deficiencies, or obesity caused by a “survival” mentally);

Educational Deficiencies

The inability to read/write, the lack of basic academic kills or no high school diploma;

Severe Trauma

History of sexual or physical abuse, combat, catastrophic loss of family, or a similar traumatic event;

Addiction

Drugs, alcohol, sex, gambling, and other addictions;

Severe Family Dysfunction

Abusive parents, broken homes, and/or multiple residences/caregivers;

No Family or Significant Support System

Total lack of family or support systems due to death, alienation, or institutional childhood;

Learning Disabilities

Dyslexia, ADHD and other disorders that interfere with education and life functioning;

Developmental Disabilities

Low IQ or brain damage that hinders intellectual functioning;

Criminal History

Existence of a criminal record that seriously limits opportunity;

Limited Occupational Skill Set

Inability to do anything beyond the most basic manual labor;

Transportation Deficiencies

Inability to purchase, maintain, insure, or legally drive a car or obtain transportation through public or private means;

Life Skill Deficiencies

Inability to manage the most basic life functions such as hygiene, housing, transportation, and interpersonal relationships;

Prior Long-Term Institutionalization

Extended stays in foster care, juvenile institutions, mental hospitals, prison, or other institution;

Generational Poverty

Two or more generations of family dependent on public assistance or charity for basic living needs that has fostered an attitude of hopelessness;

System Navigation

Inability to effectively navigate Government and Social Service Agencies;

Cognitive Disability

Impairment to how a person thinks reacts to emotions or behaviors, inability to problem solve, lack of understanding of consequences of ones actions, emotional immaturity, the all or nothing thought process, inability to manage life, impairment of mental process of knowing, including aspects such as reasoning and judgment

Generational Poverty

Two or more generations of family dependent on public assistance or charity for basic living needs that has fostered an attitude of hopelessness;

System Navigation

Inability to effectively navigate Government and Social Service Agencies;

Cognitive Disability

Impairment to how a person thinks reacts to emotions or behaviors, inability to problem solve, lack of understanding of consequences of ones actions, emotional.

10 Ways You Can Get Involved

Interested in volunteering with Room In The Inn?  You will join thousands of Middle Tennesseans who have decided to give of their time and talent to support people on the journey home.  The life you change will be your own.

Here are ten great ways to get involved.

1. Serve at your congregation’s winter shelter.

More than 6,000 Nashvillians work to shelter their homeless neighbors in 180 area congregations November 1-March 31 of each year.  Volunteers cook and serve meals, visit with guests, and serve as overnight innkeepers.  Contact your congregation to see how you can get involved.

2. Inspire recovery.

We need people in recovery from addiction to help lead 12-step meetings for our participants seeking sobriety from drugs and alcohol.  To get involved in our recovery programs, come to the next volunteer orientation.

3. Think outside the box.

We are much more than a place to sleep and eat.  Volunteers at Room In The Inn perform music in our cafe, lead our songwriters sessions, and care for people in our foot clinic.  We also have a rooftop garden that needs tending.  The idea for many of our most successful creative programs came from volunteers like you, so share your ideas with us.  Come to the next volunteer orientation to get plugged in.

4. Provide support to those in crisis.

Our activity center volunteers assist at the support desk, help operate our Fresh Start Laundry service, distribute toiletries for showers, and spend time getting to know those facing homelessness.  Come to the next volunteer orientation to get involved.

5. Educate others about homelessness.

Invite someone from the Room In The Inn community to speak to your congregation, class, or other group.  We are happy to help educate others about the experiences of the homeless community and how Room In The Inn seeks to meet its needs.  Contact our community development team to schedule a speaker.

6. Sponsor a donation drive.

Hold a special event to collect toiletries, over-the-counter medications, socks, toys for our Christmas toy store, or other items we need.  This is a great way to get your co-workers, classmates, or family involved in helping those struggling with homelessness.  Contact Room In The Inn’s community development team for more information about current needs.

7. Empower others to experience lifelong learning.

Volunteers in our Hope University adult education program offer classes on a variety of topics from job training to art to exercise.  They also help organize and operate our store, which offers participants an extra incentive to go to class.  To get involved in our innovative education program, head to the next volunteer orientation.

8. Help our participants experience a wider world.

Help host an on-site special event, a book club, or coffee house night.  Or, invite guests in our transitional programs to join you for a concert, sporting event, or other special event.  Contact our community development team if you are interested.

9. Serve up a nutritious meal.

We serve at least 1,095 meals each year at our downtown Campus.  That’s three a day.  We seek to feed not only the body, but the soul through good hospitality.  If your group is interested in providing a meal, take a look at this document for more information.

10. See hope in action.

Come take a tour of our downtown Campus and see for yourself what happens at our nationally-recognized comprehensive center for people struggling with homelessness.  Contact our community development team to schedule a tour.

Room In The Inn

Room In The Inn is in its 28th season of providing shelter for the homeless in area congregations. 180 congregations are participating, representing Methodist, Presbyterian, Baptist, the Churches of Christ, Episcopal, Catholic, Adventist, Lutheran, evangelical, Jewish, Unitarian, Disciples of Christ, Congregationalist, Nazarene, African Methodist Episcopal, and nondenominational communities. All come together to provide the grace of hospitality under the common theme of God's unconditional love for all people, especially the poor and dispossessed.

Room In The Inn is a simple concept addressing a complex problem. It starts with building relationships of trust and respect in an atmosphere of non-violence. It believes in the power of love offered in one-to-one encounters with one another.

Because so many new people have arrived in the Nashville area since Room In The Inn's inception in 1986, it may be helpful to discuss what Room In The Inn is not and what it is. Then, perhaps, more new volunteers and congregations will want to become involved.

Room In The Inn is not an attempt to resolve all of the issues of the homeless. The problems are too deep and too personal.

Room In The Inn is not a program where a congregation takes one or more homeless people "under wing," providing them with economic assistance, job training, and personal spiritual direction. These gifts can be offered in time as relationships develop.

Room In The Inn is not about establishing another large shelter downtown where hundreds of people are cared for nightly.

And it is not about boards of directors or major fund-raising campaigns for capital projects. 

What is it?

Room In The Inn is a way for more people to understand the problems of the homeless by becoming directly involved with people who are homeless.

Room In The Inn is a means through which congregations of every faith open their facilities to welcome 12-15 homeless people as guests on cold winter nights.

Room In The Inn is about changing people, guests and hosts alike. It creates the opportunity for the guests to learn that there are people who care and for the hosts to come to understand that the faceless figure on the street corner is more than a statistic and that there are solutions.

Room In The Inn is about serving without prejudice or pride. It is about accepting everyone.

Room In The Inn is not about giving; it is about receiving. It is about everyone, both guests and hosts, receiving a blessing-- an encounter with God in the midst of suffering, hardship, pain and grief.

Room In The Inn is an opportunity, not an answer. It is an experience, not a solution. In short, Room In The Inn is an opportunity to experience the presence of God in a different way.

Finally, Room In The Inn gets its name from a story in the Bible about a family coming to Bethlehem and not finding any room in the inn. We cannot go back in history 2,000 years and change that story. But what we can do in Nashville each evening we are open is to change that story’s ending by providing room in the inn. 

As 200 plus people come every night for shelter, we often change that story’s ending. The colder it gets, the more we fail. Despite over 30,000 nights of shelter offered last winter, there were many nights when we turned away between 80-100. Despite 180 congregations participating—a priceless gift to our community—there are many congregations that are not. Please consider helping out in your congregation or, better still, trying to recruit other congregations to be involved. It will change your life.